The campaign was long; this review is short
PETER CALLAGHAN; THE NEWS TRIBUNE
The year 2008 in 607 words.
Iowa holds earliest-ever caucus in longest-ever campaign. Tim Eyman proposes initiative to solve state’s traffic congestion by synchronizing stop lights. Legislature convenes; Democrats say projections of deep budget deficit are political rhetoric. Sonics threaten to leave; politicians say, “yeah, sure.” The “crucial” New Hampshire primary fails to settle presidential race. Children’s Museum and rowers battle over chunk of polluted shoreline in Tacoma.
Local officials seek state money to help retain an unnamed global financial company from leaving town. Dino Rossi and Chris Gregoire begin campaign. “Crucial” Super Tuesday primaries fail to settle presidential race. Not-so-crucial Washington primary fails to settle anything. Spring training opens with predictions that Mariners will contend. Eclipse blots out moon, fails to settle presidential race.
Crucial Texas primary … oh, nevermind. Sonics threaten to leave; politicians appoint a task force. U.S. Supreme Court rules that Washington’s Top Two primary is not an assault on the Constitution. American death toll in Iraq reaches 4,000. Barack Obama says Rust Belt residents are bitter, they react with bitterness. Seattle teacher refuses to administer WASL, is compared to Gandhi.
Attempts to capture ravenous Columbia River sea lions ends after several die in traps. Taking lead from unnamed global financial company, DaVita says it would like tax breaks to keep office in Tacoma. Cyclone hits Myanmar, earthquake hits China. Puyallup City Council scolds members who disagree with majority. State lottery says candy-themed scratch tickets aren’t aimed at kids, just adults with sweet teeth. Sonics and NBA argue at trial that pro sports really don’t do much for a region’s economy. Sonics tell Oklahoma City that team there will be an economic boon. Rossi files for office as “prefers GOP party.”
State bans cell phones when driving, sort of. Democrats use “Sopranos” music in video critical of Rossi; Italian Americans protest. Pollster says 25 percent of state voters don’t know that GOP means Republican. Sonics allowed to move to Oklahoma City where fans rejoice, until they see them play. Gas reaches $4.30 a gallon.
Miss Washington gets tabloid treatment after photos appear of her playing beer pong while wearing her crown. Tall Ships make landfall in Tacoma, draw lots of people but not enough money. Seattle council votes to tax paper and plastic grocery bags. Russia invades Georgia (no, not THAT Georgia). Boeing machinists go on strike. Olympics begin; Michael Phelps finishes fourth in gold medal count behind China, Germany and U.S. Gold-medal winning Chinese women gymnasts reach puberty. Tacoma votes to allow 18-story condos on waterfront, delighting wealthy condo buyers – all two of them. Rossi and Gregoire attack each other for attacking each other. WAMU fails. John McCain picks Sarah Palin as running mate (or was that Tina Fey?).
Lakewood cops rally for mini-casinos. Joe Biden visits Tacoma, is only candidate on either ticket to campaign in state. Congress approves $700 billion bailout of Wall Street. Joe the Plumber becomes campaign icon. Mariners lose 100-plus games with $100 million-plus payroll. Barack Obama and Joe Biden defeat John McCain and Tina Fey (or was that Sarah Palin?).
With election safely over, Democrats say state budget is in deficit. Tim Eyman and voters don’t synch. Tacoma convention center fails to meet economic projections; Seattle proposes $766 million expansion of its own failing convention center.
Colleges told to expect big budget cuts. States and cities line up at Obama stimulus trough, say they’re the most shovel-ready. Husky football ends season 0-12, fires coach. Christian groups and atheists hold competition in Olympia to see which is more embarrassing; tie is declared. Seahawks finish season 4-12. Gas finishes year around $1.79. It snows … a lot.
Peter Callaghan: 253-597-8657