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Our man Isaiah keeps his hands, alas, to himself

Published: 03/20/09 12:05 am | Updated: 03/21/09 9:53 pm
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Nothing compares to March, when dozens of foes grunt, sweat, scratch and elbow each other over three weeks for the right to be called No. 1.

But enough about the Daffodil Queen coronation. It’s NCAA tournament time, and it was nice to see both the Huskies and the Zags hold up their ends of the bracket Thursday.

We were most glad to see our own Curtis High School product, Isaiah Thomas, use his hands solely for passing, dribbling and shooting.

Somehow those nifty fingers turn into witless mitts when he gets caught up in the glory of the moment.

Note to the UW freshman phenom: Keep a basketball in your hands at all times.

The pride of U-Place is an adult now, after a couple of years going to a finishing school back East. The last thing he should do to prove his manhood is to grab down there, as he did on the tournament selection show Sunday. As did fellow handyman Venoy Overton.

Tweeeeet! Offensive foul charged to No. 1 and No. 2! Reaching in!

Isaiah’s sub-equatorial exploration took place in front of a national TV audience. And on the front page of his hometown paper the next day. (Which makes the TNT an accessory after the fact, as some callers pointed out.)

This can’t be what the kindergarten teacher meant when she told the boys to keep their hands to themselves.

Who does he think he is? A major league outfielder? Michael Jackson?

U-Dub hoops coach Lorenzo Romar is not Tyrone Willingham. For starters, Romar won a game (or 26) this season. But if he had Ty’s spine, Lo-Ro might’ve benched his all-hands team duo to start Thursday’s game.

Coach wouldn’t have to lie. Just say they were out with a groin pull.

As the state budget deficit balloons to $9 billion, we figured out lawmakers could buy two nuclear-powered aircraft carriers for the same amount.

Buy those ships, we say. Then Washington won’t have to take any more holier-than-thou guff from Oregon. Or else, KABOOM!

Some readers were alarmed by a photo in Tuesday’s paper, which purported to show Spanaway Lake High School students practicing the Heimlich maneuver but showed a laughing lad throttling a dummy.

It looked like the class was horsing around. Turns out, they were demonstrating the proper sign for choking.

If you ever need advice on how to do the Heimlich, we suggest asking these kids. Not Isaiah Thomas.

Got news for The Nose? Call 253- 597- 8742, Ext. NOSE (6673) or write TheNose@thenewstribune.com.

Editor's note: Both Thomas and his parents say that he was holding his cell phone and other electronic devices in place Sunday when he was seen holding the front of his pants.

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