There’s something about T-Town that makes us a magnet for ill-fated buckets of scrap metal.
No, we’re not talking about the Toyota Tacoma.
It so happens this year is the 75th anniversary of the Kalakala, the old art-deco ferry rusting on the Hylebos Waterway.
The ship so nice, they named it twice. The one that looks like a B-movie spacecraft abandoned by aliens who landed here in 1959, got hooked on Frisko Freeze and never went home.
Say this much for Kalakala owner Steve Rodrigues: The guy has chutzpah. Seems every few months he floats a new vision for saving the boat he bought in 2003.
First he vowed to make it the star of the Port Angeles waterfront. Instead, he towed it to Tacoma and said he’d fix it up and keep it here for school kids and wedding parties.
Soon his eye wandered to Seattle – gee, what a shock. Then it was back to Tacoma as the center of a proposed attraction called “Columbia Gardens,” featuring a carousel and ice arena. (We think “KalakaLand” would draw more tourists.) Then last fall he said Port Angeles was back in the game.
Dizzy yet? This month he said he was leaving on a cross-country tour in a rented bus, capped by a visit with President Obama.
“I hope that I have a beer with him in the Rose Garden,” Rodrigues told KING 5 News. “The agenda would be to talk about the Kalakala as a national landmark.”
Way to dream big. While you’re tipping back Schlitz tall boys with the prez, ask if he wants your boat for the Potomac.
Beer and the Kalakala? It’s a perfect combination. Cover the windows, seal the hatches, and the thing would look like the world’s largest pony keg.
Buckets of metal, part 2: While doing some historical naval gazing lately, we learned about the four ships named USS Tacoma since 1893. All have been retired or scrapped.
Sure, the bell from the cruiser Tacoma is displayed honorably at War Memorial Park. (When punks aren’t trying to steal or deface it.)
But only one ship named Tacoma lives on as a museum piece – and you have to go to South Korea to see it.
Dumb luck, meantime, has given Washington’s capital city not one, but two, surviving namesake ships.
The original USS Olympia is the sole remaining vessel from the Spanish-American War.
The other USS Olympia is an active-duty submarine based at Pearl Harbor. And wouldn’t you know, the make-love-not-war crowd down in O-Town wants nothing to do with a fast-attack nuclear sub.
It’s enough to set our nostrils flaring – and not because of the usual downwind bouquet of body odor and weed.
It’s jealousy of our dopey kid sister, righteous and pure.
Never thought we’d feel it again after the Olympia Brewery closed.
Nothing personal, O-Town. It’s just that you’re patchouli, and we’re Chihuly. And never the twain shall meet.
So it was hard to suppress a grin recently after hearing the original USS Olympia might be bound for the scrapyard.
The Independence Seaport Museum in Philadelphia can no longer afford to maintain it, and is looking for a new owner to invest up to $30 million.
Many millions of dollars to save a sinking public institution named Olympia?
Any parallel to what’s happening 30 miles south of here is coincidental.
Seen at Sea-Tac Airport: A large billboard on the departure level reads: “Toyota: moving forward.”
For the next ad campaign, how about: “Toyota: There’s no stopping us now.”
The Nose blows it: Two weeks ago, we noted the northward march of Burgerville as an example of the creeping Oregon-ization of our Puget Sound home.
Au contraire, writes Byron Smith of Milton.
“If you had grown up in Vancouver (WA) in the ’60s, you would know that Burgerville started in Vancouver (WA) to bring us kids back across the river from Waddles (now a Hooters) by the families who owned the Holland and Totem Pole restaurants.”
By thunder, Byron, you’ve smartened us up today.
Of course Burgerville started in Vancouver. But we had no clue Vancouver is in Washington. When did that happen?
Got news for The Nose? Write TheNose@thenewstribune.com.
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