Funny how things have turned backwards for the space cadets up north who once threw a 21st century party for the world.
Fifty years ago, they were living in the future. Now, they’re living in the past.
Next year marks the anniversary of the 1962 World’s Fair, which produced revolutionary inventions such as the Monorail, the Bubbleator and a 605-foot-tall flying saucer on a stick.
And how are Seattle boosters getting ready for their yearlong fest of nostagia and vanity? They’re inviting folks to share memories and hear a presentation by a King County author this Sunday at 2 p.m. at – wait for it – the downtown Tacoma library.
Excuse us for leaving the pompoms at home. Here in the city of perpetual insecurity, we were thinking of a different way to observe the 50th. But we haven’t yet calculated how many rolls of Cottonelle it’ll take to TP the Space Needle.
This just in!: We interrupt our regularly scheduled childish resentment with a news bulletin from our sources at HistoryLink.org.
They tell us that Tacoma had a key role at the 1962 World’s Fair.
Tacoma’s George M. Spray and Associates produced a futuristic burlesque act, “Girls of the Galaxy,” held on the fairgrounds’ Show Street. The Seattle Censor Board, however, closed it down because of too much hoochy-coochie shimmying by bare-breasted “space girls.”
Sounds like something George Jetson might’ve enjoyed at his bachelor party.
The lesson here is that Tacoma did back then what Tacoma always does best: make stuffed-shirt Seattle uncomfortable by being too close and refusing to control our boobs.
Other T-Town highlights at the World’s Fair: Tacoma bedding manufacturer Spring Air rolled out an officially licensed Century 21 mattress.
And the Nalley Pavilion, featuring Nalley’s Space Age Theater, showcased the journey food takes from farm field to kitchen table.
A true visionary would’ve combined the two into a single exhibit: “Companies with no future in Tacoma in 50 years.”
New holiday tradition?: We’re all about freshening up the family’s Christmas activity list. The lighting of the tree outside the Pantages? Been there, done that. The unlighting of the “S” on the Tacoma Self Storage sign? A bit, uh, anticlimactic for the lil’ Nostrils.
So we consider it glad tidings that The Grand Cinema for the second year is showing a creepy Christmas movie. This one’s a dark fairy tale from Finland featuring a sinister Santa who chews off people’s ears.
The theater also invites ticket holders to have their pictures taken with a real “demented Santa” at Tuesday’s screenings. (Details at www.grandcinema.com.)
Sadly, the Grand had to spoil a good thing by falling into a lazy stereotype: Put a giant honker on a guy and suddenly he’s demented.
It’s nasally insensitive, even if he does look like our Uncle Ned at last year’s holiday family reunion.
Attention, Giggles Harbor scofflaws: During a special amnesty period all this month, you can clear your conscience and arrest warrants at City Hall without fear of paying a $50 fine or being sent to the pokey.
So go ahead, turn yourself in and spend that cash on a Botox injection or other early Christmas gift to yourself.
Never would’ve figured GH to be a city with a backlog of 300 warrants – not in a place where Miss Demeanor sounds like a holistic lifestyle coach for kindergarteners.
What kind of misbehavior will get you busted in Dah Harbor, anyway? Perhaps these:
- Cramming an 80-foot yacht into a 50-foot slip.
- Ordering a bottle of white wine with the boeuf bourguignon at Brix 25.
- Trying to buy diamond earrings using a Good to Go! account in lieu of canceled credit cards.
- Driving the wrong way in a roundabout while distracted by the barking labradoodle in your lap.
- Driving with an FI decal on your rear window under false pretenses; you really live in Artondale and just know people on Fox Island.
And how will the city enhance the experience of turning yourself in at Gig Harbor court?
- Complimentary valet parking.
- Pet walking concierge service.
- Gift basket from the mayor.
Got news for The Nose? Write to TheNose@thenewstribune.com.
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