Not even Halloween yet and the skeletons are already slipping out of the closet.
At this week’s meeting of the City Club of Tacoma, school district boss Carla Santorno warmed up her audience of movers and shakers with a couple of tales from her family’s lore.
The supe grew up in Denver, but she never knew she was related to a notorious Chicagoan until she applied for a job with the FBI.
Times were tough for teachers in her younger days, she explained. So she was looking for any gig.
But she never made the cut to join the Bureau because she flunked the security clearance.
Nothing personal, the G-men told her. But did you know you’re related to the real-life “Bad, Bad Leroy Brown?”
You know, the “baddest man in the whole damn town” whom Jim Croce sang about – the one “from the South Side of Chicago” who’s “badder than old King Kong?”
She did not. So she crossed a couple of career prospects off her list.
“I can’t be in the FBI,” Santorno told the City Club. “I can’t be president. But I am embracing education.”
And education is embracing her right back. The Tacoma School Board recently promoted Santorno from interim to permanent superintendent.
Seems like a wise move, given her family connections. One doesn’t mess around with someone whose bloodline is “meaner than a junkyard dog.”
Blame the long, hot summer: How else to explain the rash of police encounters with naked guys in the Puget Sound area this month? Maybe they should call it a heat rash.
First there was the nude dude who managed to elude Seattle cops for two hours after tackling two people and jumping into Green Lake.
Then came the racy Lacey man who distracted drivers near Interstate 5 in Thurston County on Wednesday, causing 911 to be flooded with calls.
Helpful passers-by, who weren’t interested in seeing a one-man performance of “The Full Monty,” did their best to nip it in the butt er, bud.
“Bystanders tried covering him up with sleeping bags and offered him articles of clothing to put on,” Olympia Police Sgt. Rich Allen told The Olympian.
“When officers showed up, he’d put on the article, and when officers left, he’d take it off again,” Allen said.
Mr. Full Moon was finally arrested after police issued two warnings.
Apparently, his claim that his clothes kept falling off held up about as well as a pair of broken suspenders.One thing’s certain about cheeky offenders like these: They should be easy to pick out of a police lineup.
It’s been quite a streak: We’d like to remind any potential exhibitionists with a flair for the dramatic: The Puyallup Fair ends Sunday!
And about that fair: Takes some real cojones for those hombres in white cowboy hats down in Meekerville to suddenly announce, “We shall henceforth be known as the Washington State Fair!”
Did the goldfinch awake one morning long ago and chirp brightly to the world “I am the state bird!” Did the apple declare itself the state fruit, or the hemlock the state tree?
What’s stopping The Nose from arbitrarily naming itself the official Washington State Wise-Ass? Can the Kalakala be the Washington State Derelict Vessel?
Seems the Scone Kings have pretensions that neither Puyallup nor Western Washington can contain.
Thus sayeth the Friday columnist for The News Tribune – which no longer has Tacoma in its name and hereby proclaims itself the official Washington State Newspaper.
Thank heaven he sang just one verse: You know how at Rotary Club meetings they always come up with silly ways to recognize members who are having a birthday? Like, make them put on silly hats or pose as game show contestants and answer silly questions.
Well, at Tacoma Rotary 8 on Thursday, the leaders wondered if any celebrants had ever been serenaded by a real, live candidate for governor. And when the answer was no, they made their guest speaker sing “Happy Birthday.”
Jay Inslee was game, but let’s just say the Democrat shouldn’t give up his day job.
Even though he doesn’t have one.Got news for The Nose? Write to TheNose@thenewstribune.com.