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Just what this state needs, an official oak tree

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Published: 01/30/0912:05 am
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As if Washington’s official state tree weren’t already a brain teaser. Now the busybodies in Olympia are further messing with our minds by trying to designate an official state oak tree.

Ask 10 strangers to name Washington’s tree, and roughly nine will answer the Douglas fir. The 10th might get the correct answer (Western hemlock), but would be unlikely to know that Oregonians needled us into picking it in 1946, after they’d already snatched Doug for their symbol.

Saps that we are, the hemlock it is. (What’s that tree good for, anyway? Other than assisting with suicide.)

Now some pols are promoting the Garry oak as the state oak tree. The Garry is more widely known as the Oregon white oak, but we won’t be snookered by those too-lazy-to pump-their-own-gas southerners again.

One might argue that we should be a fan of the Garry oak. It’s native to historic prairie lands around Fort Lewis, and still towers over parts of Tacoma, Lakewood and Parkland.

But we can’t take any bill seriously when it’s the baby of Sen. Ken Jacobsen. This is the same Seattle Democrat who would change state law to let us be buried with our dead pets and take them into bars at happy hour, presumably while they’re still alive.

If Washington doesn’t already have an official nut, we’d like to nominate Jacobsen.

“Garry” oak, huh? He’s represented Washington before and surely would do it again, if asked to be a symbol.

Most stunning gubernatorial hairdo this side of Blagojevich. And he’s only slightly less wooden than the tree.

Whither J-Lad? According to our crack research staff, the former Pierce County exec took a long enough break from the golf course to lobby for his next job via the Interweb.

Seen Thursday on Facebook: “Support John Ladenburg as EPA Administrator Region 10!”

So far the group has 203 “friends.” It’s unclear how many are really relatives.

Puyallup, you’re not ready for your close-up.

Meekerville honchos made more jokes than usual during their first-ever TV broadcast this month, and City Manager Gary McLean cracked wise about his receding hairline.

Now they’re experiencing technical difficulties. On Tuesday, they had trouble with their microphones.

With the mayor absent, two council members scooted over so they weren’t in their usual seats. Deputy mayor George Dill struggled to cue the mikes when it was their turn to speak.

Councilman John Knutsen tried to help. “If it says ‘Dill’ and it’s not you, it’s (Councilman Rick) Hansen, and when it says ‘Hansen,’ it’s me,” Knutsen told Dill.

Dill looked hard at the screen that helps control the mikes.

“For an explanation to the audience, we’re sitting in the wrong chairs,” Dill said. Turning back to Knutsen, he asked, “Now, who are you?”

We kept waiting for Councilmen Abbott and Costello to show up.

And you thought Fife’s televised meetings were as good as it gets.

With entertainment like this, you’d be a fool not to make the transition to digital next month.

Nothing like a ceremonial lovefest to banish the memory of awful conditions at King County animal shelters.

KingCo Exec Ron Sims joined volunteers and staff Monday in Kent to dedicate a new cat adoption center and an adjoining veterinary clinic.

They pooh-poohed the traditional ribbon-cutting and went with dog leashes linked between buildings.

Cat dignitaries hoping for a big ball of yarn must’ve left disappointed.

No word on whether Sen. Jacobsen showed up to the wingding with cocktails for the animals.

Got news for The Nose? Call 253-597-8742, Ext. NOSE (6673) or write TheNose@thenewstribune.com.

 

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