Opinion

The Five Spot: 5 reasons Tacoma doesn’t want to be hipster mecca

Hipsters feel right at home in Boise, which at No. 4 on the US Hipster Index, is two spots above Tacoma.
Hipsters feel right at home in Boise, which at No. 4 on the US Hipster Index, is two spots above Tacoma. Idaho Statesman file photo, 2013

Five bad things about Tacoma being rated a top city on the US Hipster Index.

1 Seattle didn’t make Top 10 list, so now even more of its young pretentious urban bohemians will move down here.

2 Obsessive hipster thrift store shopping results in a local plaid flannel deficit and less cheap stuff for poor Tacomans who really need it.

3 Vancouver, Wash., was rated No. 1, Salt Lake City No. 2 and Spokane a slot behind us at No. 7. So this list must be a sarcastic hipster in-joke.

4 If Tacoma is overrun by 20-something hipsters, there won’t be enough responsible older people left with basements for them to live in (and brew skanky beer).

5 Turns out the list had a typo. Tacoma is actually the sixth-best city for hicksters. (Attracted by Garth Brooks concerts, monster truck rallies, etc.)

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