The five spot: 5 reasons to vote in primary

Five reasons Washington Democrats should vote Republican in the May 24 presidential primary:

1. Limited time offer: Free box of Trump Steaks with every ballot cast for Donald Trump.

2. Ben Carson is still on the ballot. We don’t recall much about him, but he seemed like a decent guy.

3. Hillary and Bernie don’t need your vote. Other than a 48-hour period when they barnstormed the state in late March, Washington voters are dead to them.

4. It’ll take you, like, 30 seconds to vote. That’s a roughly 1,400-times smaller commitment than was required to participate in the Democratic caucus.

5. For the same reason you might consider calling an escort service. It provides a devious thrill without any long-term commitment.

This story was originally published May 15, 2016 at 3:09 PM with the headline "The five spot: 5 reasons to vote in primary."