Ruston boy’s pandemic birthday turns ugly. Isolation affecting folks in ‘strange ways,’ mom says
One creative and colorful product of pandemic society that people will remember for years — mostly with fondness, we hope — is the social-distance birthday party.
Necessity is the mother of invention, and so it’s been for several Pierce County families who can’t throw traditional parties for their kids, with friends, games and sleepovers.
Last month, a Tacoma girl turning 11 stood in a yard full of plastic flamingos while friends sang and held banners across the street. Last Friday, a Fircrest boy with cerebral palsy was treated to a procession of police and fire vehicles for his 5th birthday.
Some make-do celebrations don’t go according to plan. But none has taken a turn as weird and unfortunate as last week’s drive-by birthday parade for JJ O’Brien of Ruston.
JJ’s 11th birthday started like every young boy’s dream — a caravan of Camaros from a local car club roared past his house, along with police and fire vehicles, while friends, teachers and neighbors gathered out front.
It escalated into a confrontation with a pair of angry neighbors, including a Ruston City Council member, who were bothered by the commotion. The couple came outside, expressed their feelings with vulgar words and gestures, and got crossways with first responders.
No police reports were filed, but Ruston’s mayor was later asked to take action, and the offending councilman sent an apology letter to the O’Briens, six days after the incident.
“I hope you will accept this sincere personal apology from us,” the letter signed by Lyle and Patti Hardin concludes. “We take full responsibility for our actions.”
For JJ, his pandemic birthday may prove to be a learning experience — a surreal occasion redeemed by the graciousness of others, and a chance to extend some of his own at a stressful time when many people need it.
For the rest of us, there may be a lesson as well. Yes, some of these celebrations are loud and disruptive. They may not fit your idea of what stay-home orders look like. But South Sounders should be able to grin and bear it for the sake of giving children a small slice of birthday joy.
JJ’s unique party unfolded the evening of April 21. His mother, Connie, says it served a purpose beyond celebrating a birthday: It brought together Point Defiance Elementary School fifth graders who’ve been friends since kindergarten and now move on to middle school, denied a proper sendoff by the COVID-19 crisis.
“It lasted 30-40 minutes start to end,” Connie O’Brien wrote in a letter to the mayor. “We left no trash, released no balloons and ensured social distancing the complete time … The smiles were from ear to ear and it was truly magical and exactly what we as a community and friends needed.”
The magic spell broke once the Hardins came outside, flashing anger and obscenities.
Connie O’Brien filed a complaint with Ruston Mayor Bruce Hopkins; she asked for an investigation and a letter of apology to share with JJ’s teacher, a witness to the ugly scene.
While Hopkins conveyed regret on behalf of the city, he said no action would be taken since Hardin wasn’t acting in an official capacity at the time. But the letter did come, eventually.
Kudos to the O’Briens for bringing energy to their neighborhood; Connie says they accept the apology as sincere, noting that everyone makes mistakes.
“The social isolation and difficulties so many are facing right now are starting to show up in strange ways,” O’Brien wrote to JJ’s teacher. “For many this is a difficult time.”
That’s true, though it’s shocking that any elected official would behave so inappropriately in public. This incident shouldn’t be forgotten if Hardin runs for reelection next year.
Mostly, however, we congratulate JJ and his classmates for persevering through a pandemic that cut short their fifth-grade year. Maybe even their childhood.
Here’s hoping your 12th birthday is as traditional as they come.
This story was originally published April 29, 2020 at 11:00 AM.