Washington is one of the most introverted states in the U.S. How to beat the ‘Seattle Freeze’
Meeting new people in your adult years can be difficult to do anywhere, but it seems to be even harder to do in the Pacific Northwest.
A recent study analyzed data gathered for the American Time Use Survey by the Census Bureau for the Bureau of Labor Statistics. They analyzed which states are the most introverted by establishing a series of everyday activities and organizing them into four categories which were fitness, entertainment, home and leisure — Washington came in at number nine. This means that people in Washington are more inclined to do daily activities on their own.
In fact, meeting new people and building new friendships can be complicated no matter where you live, since adults are less likely to be willing to try new things, according to the UW Medicine website.
The following 10 states are the most introverted, according to the study:
- Vermont
- New Hampshire
- Montana
- Alaska
- Connecticut
- New Mexico
- Oregon
- Colorado
- Washington
- Massachusetts
What is the Seattle Freeze?
Making new friends in parts of the Pacific Northwest, such as in Washington, is so difficult that a term has been coined to describe it: the “Seattle Freeze.”
But is it a real phenomena, or just a figment of people’s imagination?
Koriann Cox, a clinical assistant professor at the University of Washington, said in an interview that it certainly is a lot harder to meet new people in cities such as Seattle because of people’s social habits.
“It’s difficult to make friends, in part, because people in Seattle are generally polite and nice, and we’ll talk to you, but not necessarily overly friendly, in that they’re not going to go out of their way to make sure you are invited or attend social gatherings,” Cox said.
Dreary weather can also make it more difficult to meet new people since it is known to cause seasonal affective disorder.
Seasonal affective disorder is more prevalent during the fall and winter seasons because there are more days that have overcast weather and the days are shorter, and cause people to self-isolate more during this time, Cox said.
“When you’re feeling really depressed, you’re not interacting with people, and you may not be moving around quite as much,” Cox said. “If the only sort of ‘conversation’ you’re having is the one with your depression or your anxiety that’s telling you you’re bad or you’re wrong or nobody likes you, if you’re isolated, that’s not getting challenged.”
Cox says that combating those feelings of isolation requires making an effort to make “connections with people who care about you or who challenge that way of thinking.”
Although it may be harder to meet new people in Washington, it isn’t impossible and it is important to continue trying for the sake of your physical and mental health.
According to the Centers for Disease and Prevention, strong relationships and social connections can prevent serious illnesses and “can lead to longer life, better health, and well-being.”
Ways to beat the “Seattle Freeze”
Whether you’ve lived in Washington your entire life and are seeking to broaden your friendship circle, or you’ve recently moved here, there are ways to beat the Seattle Freeze.
Cox said one of the main things that makes it hard to make new friendships in adulthood is that we no longer have the same forced proximity to people like when we were children. That means fewer opportunities to meet people, except for in the workplace.
She says that one of the best ways to make friends is to go out and do the things you are interested in and meet people there.
“If you’re interested in painting, for example, take a painting class and then, by nature, the people in that class are also at least marginally interested in painting so you are getting that connection,” Cox said. “Then that way, you also have the benefit of you’re going out and doing something that you enjoy and if you make a new friend awesome, and if you don’t, you’re at least doing something you like.”
Cox also noted the importance of taking into consideration the fact that as adults we are busier, and that just because someone cannot spend time with you right away, it does not mean that they don’t want to.
Here are four tips to follow to make help new friends, according to UW Medicine:
Allow yourself the space to be a beginner at making friends and be ok with making mistakes.
Take the initiative to get involved in groups or activities that align with your interests and values.
Work to build your weak ties or acquaintances since they can help to boost your well-being.
Put in the effort to build new friendships, but also remember to be patient and focus on your other goals in the meantime.
