Opinion

Easy does it: Five foolproof ways to get lazy folks to vote

Gee, that ballot is all the way across the room. I wonder if I can get the dog to bring it to me – or better yet, fill it out for me.
Gee, that ballot is all the way across the room. I wonder if I can get the dog to bring it to me – or better yet, fill it out for me.

Five other ideas that might motivate lazy Washingtonians to vote, besides same-day voter registration (which has its coming-out party in Tuesday’s primary election).



1. One-week-late voter registration. For people on vacation or too distracted by the new season of “Bachelor in Paradise” to meet the Aug. 6 deadline.

2. Same-day voter relaxation. Free chair massages available at Pierce County Election Center. Because muscles can get awfully sore from filling in all those ballot bubbles.

3. Automatic voter registration when signing up for a hunting, fishing or clamming license. Also any credit card application or restaurant rewards program.

4. Podcasts of Hollywood celebrities giving dramatic readings from the Pierce County voters pamphlet.

5. Household smart speaker democracy project. (“Alexa, vote yes on West Pierce fire levy.”) No more annoying pens, confusing envelopes and nasty paper cuts.

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