From cat whiskers to Seahawks, masks not so bad after all. Do your part to kill COVID
In spite of the statewide mask mandate, some Washingtonians are still refusing to wear them.
While shopping at a big box store recently, a bare-faced woman checking out in front of me wore a mask under her chin.
After she left, the cashier answered my furrowed brow, “That happens a lot. People are technically ‘wearing a mask,’ but not correctly.”
It’s little wonder that Americans are dying at a rate 17 times higher than Europeans and Canadians. We need a national mask mandate. We also need local elected leaders to get the message out and get it out frequently. Pierce County is on a dangerous trajectory with an average of 90 cases of COVID per day.
It baffles me what the fuss is about wearing masks, but then again, I’m a middle-aged woman with a few things to hide, mainly wrinkles and an age spot shaped like the state of Texas. So, if I’m being honest, masks aren’t all bad.
Don’t get me wrong, I hate everything about the pandemic: the lost lives, the illness, the fear of illness, the isolation, the tanked economy. It all stinks, but mask-wearing seems the least of these, and yet, day after day, another video goes viral of someone refusing to wear one.
A social media meme that persists says they cause “carbon dioxide to accumulate in the blood.” It’s been repeatedly debunked by doctors and scientists. Wearing a mask might not be pleasant after eating, say, a tuna fish sandwich, but it’s not dangerous.
All I know is you can’t blow out a candle while wearing a mask, and that’s enough science to convince me that we’re all safer from disease-carrying respiratory droplets when we wear them.
Other mask conspiracies swirl, darker ones involving “government mind control” and “social engineering experiments.” Just be warned, the people touting these are likely to believe the moon landing was fake or that Bigfoot is living as a hipster on Seattle’s Capitol Hill.
Mostly, folks don’t want to wear masks because they don’t like being told what to do, and I get that. They see masks as a sign of giving in to hysteria, or worse, giving in to government authority.
But construction workers don’t stand around work sites debating the likelihood of something falling on their head. They just wear the required safety equipment and work without complaint, an example more Americans need to follow.
On the brighter side, masks are quickly becoming an avenue for self expression. People have gotten clever with 2020’s must-have fashion accessory.
The other day I saw a woman wearing a cat mask complete with whiskers. It took everything in me not to meow at her or say, “What’s with the sour puss?”
Several of them brandish bold political slogans or directives like “Smile,” “Vote!” and “Not today, Death.” Designers are even getting in on the action calling masks, “COVID couture.”
Want a mask made with fresh water pearls? Cough up nine thousand bucks and it’s yours.
Had I known what challenges lie ahead in the year 2020, you can bet I would’ve paid more attention to sewing instruction in 7th grade Home Economics class instead of furtively reading Stephen King.
King is your go-to guy when it comes to warding off vampires, but viruses not so much.
Lucky for me, several friends have gifted me masks, my favorite being a Seahawks one. I wear it when I want to channel my inner Tyler Lockett and go the wrong way up the supermarket aisle.
The only downside of masks is the lost opportunity to see one another’s facial expressions, an important part of interpreting social cues. I feel sorry for babies and young children missing out on friendly smiles; maybe all the more reason to bring out the whiskers.
But little kids learn early that superheroes sport masks, and the pandemic has given us all a chance to be one. Wear a mask and save lives. It’s that simple.
Reach News Tribune editorial writer Karen Irwin at karen.irwin@thenewstribune.com